My Take On Equality

Like I said during Manic Monday, I wanted to endeavor more into the equality topic. So I would like to start off with saying that equality means EQUAL all around for all people.

 

Take women in the workplace for example, being that is one of the biggest ones. To be equal, you should get the SAME pay as men. Not less, but not more as well. Also with equality, you have to take the same shit that men do while at work. Men don’t go around talking about sexual harassment and how they feel violated. Equality is EQUAL. That doesn’t mean that if a man were to REALLY violate you, you have to bypass it, but jokes and such do not matter anymore. That’s equality. Also, just because you are a woman, it doesn’t give you special privileges either. You don’t get special treatment anymore. The only thing that you would get different than men is time off after having a child. Because let’s face it, that’s worth the time off. You pushed a baby out of your vagina and men cant do that. But I do believe that men should get that time off too. We need time to bond with our child as well and that’s just fair, or EQUAL as I would say.

 

For gay marriage, it’s part of being equal. If you are a woman wanting equal rights, it should be equal for everyone, right? That includes gay marriage. Saying “I want equal rights for everyone” includes EVERYONE! You can’t just say it, then exclude one or so groups of people. So if you are for equal rights, you have to be for them for everyone. I, for one, support gay marriage and FULLY equal rights for all. But when I say I support it, I mean everything has to be equal. 100% all around equal.

 

MY thing about equality is that a lot of people like to bitch about everything. If you have equality, what else is there to bitch about? That’s what a lot of people use as their prime topics of complaining. If you don’t have equality, what’s next? Probably something that no one cares about at all. So think about that before saying you want equality. Are you someone who likes to complain? If so, equality probably isn’t for you.

 

Also with equality, I think that is why men are the superior race. If people aren’t striving to be BETTER than others, then the bar sits at straight white men. To better yourself is a goal that says, we want to be better. If you are just aiming to be equal with straight white men, then that makes said straight white men superior than everyone else. Right? That’s not me being a bigot either, it’s just standard based on facts said above. With equality, there would be no “better” people, which I can agree would be good. But how do you get there? You aim higher. 

Manic Monday – Volume VI

CRIPPITY CRAP, IT’S MANIC MONDAY!! That’s right, it’s the worst day of the week for most people so I enlighten the mood by telling you some of the crazy shit that went on in my head this week and actually remembered to write it down for your enjoyment! Buckle up you literate reader because chances are, even I have no idea what’s about to be published!!

 

One of my biggest pet peeves is being around people who hate sarcasm or people who just don’t understand it. It’s annoying knowing that you can’t use sarcasm around them because of how often I use it. I’m very sarcastic and satirical the majority of the time. It’s fun and I don’t feel like giving it up for anyone. Hell, I don’t understand how people don’t get it. It’s typically obvious and even if it’s hidden better, it’s still easy to depict. And for those who just hate it, WHY? Sarcasm is such a great thing and should be used in almost every situation! But hey, that’s just my opinion.

 

One thing that I do not understand is: who the hell created words and names for things? I mean, they created this universal language that everyone understands… Words. For example, I want to know who pointed at a tree and said, “That’s a tree”. Why is it not a car, or bread, or purple for that matter? Why do we not look at a table and say, “That’s a great couch”? What if everything were different? I know that we would be used to it by now, but in general. Have you ever sat back and thought like this? Imagine looking at a tree and calling it a purple… it seems weird, but think, there is a chance that it could have been named that. Instead of counting 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 it could be Blanket, Pizza, Remote, Coffee, Baby! But one (or a few) person(s) said nay- this is the way it’s going to be. And we all know it now. How different the world would be if language were not the same.

 

Here’s a big topic: equality. There is so much I can say about equality, so there will probably be a full post on just that. But to give you a brief thought for the day, I’ll start it in Manic Monday. So, does anyone really want equal rights? Let’s say, gay rights for example. As soon as you get equal rights, you have nothing to bitch about anymore. If everything were 100% fair, would it really be fair? There would always be discrimination still, that’s one thing that will never go away. Yeah, you would be able to marry whom ever you want to, but why would you want to do that anyway? Marriage sucks! It’s a full time job, on top of your actual job. Just a thought. Though I will say that I stand by equality, which sounds like a contradiction but it’s not. I think everyone should be equal, but REALLY equal. But I’ll get more in depth with this later.

 

Here’s a simple and complex question all in one: What is Forever? Is it for life, for a while, never ending even after death? Hell, I don’t know, but then again, does anyone really know? Ponder that for a good minute. What IS Forever? Does it differ form person to person? Does it matter what the topic that forever is titling (i.e. a break up, a home, a child, etc.)? Go ahead, tell me what you think.  

Fandom Friday – Mania

Welcome to Fandom Friday, where I talk about something or someone that I like and why you should too. This week I will be writing about being Manic Depressive.

 

Now I know that no one actually has the choice to be Manic, but you can always support those of us that are. By support, I do not mean give us money (though I won’t turn it down (haha)). What I mean by support is read our blogs (I’ve noticed a lot of us have them), listen to us, maybe even just be a friend.

 

Only 2.5% of the US population has some kind of bipolar disorder and 0.1-0.7% of said population is Manic Depressive. It’s not like we bump into each other on the daily basis, in fact it’s usually rare. So find yourself lucky that you found one and you can read all about some of the crazy shit that goes on (and this is only a slim portion for now).

 

Yes, it seems weird to be writing about why someone would enjoy having such a crazy illness. The thing about it is, it DOES suck, it does. However, if you learn to love the ride, it also makes life fun. The lows are hard but those highs are fantastic. If you don’t know what Manic Depressive Disorder is, read my second post ever, “What Is This Blog?” It gives you a brief overview of the disorder and it will let you know what it’s all about and what I’m all about.

 

The reason I am writing about this on Fandom Friday is because I want my readers to enjoy the fact they come to read a blog about nothing and everything all in one. It’s different day in and day out. It changes and you never know what to expect. I range from inspirational writings to rants, then back to inspiration to how I think celebrities suck, then I have Manic Mondays which is a load of everything under the sun, Fandom Fridays where you may find your new favorite thing/person/location (who knows), and some days I even tell you how to live your life to a healthier level and get in touch with your inner child.

 

There are days (as with “normal” people) that life just bites me in the ass and sucks, but there are so many days/weeks/months that I have highs that don’t go away and life is AWESOME (and those times last longer than those of “normal” people).

 

All I’m saying is: just give us crazies a chance. We are actually a big ball of fun and you never know what to expect.

Fandom Friday – Toaster Strudel

Welcome to Fandom Friday, where I talk about something or someone that I like and why you should too. This week I will be writing about Toaster Strudel.

 

I know you’re probably thinking that everyone loves Toaster Strudel. Well, when was the last time you actually bought a box of goodness? I, personally, buy the big pack of them weekly at Sam’s Club (Wal-Mart’s sister store where fat people buy in bulk, like me).

 

For those of you uneducated folk, a Toaster Strudel is a fruit pastry (predominantly) that you cover in what is pretty much just a sugar serum and let me tell you, they are fantastic. It’s like childhood in a box. So why doesn’t everyone buy them all the time? Well, I did think of a couple downfalls.

 

First off, they’re like $9,000.00 USD for a box of six (exaggeration of course). Next, they don’t fill you up, so you eat that expensive box all at once. Finally, you get third degree burns taking them out of the toaster (which I don’t know why we don’t have advanced technology on fixing this issue yet).

 

Other than that, these babies are glorious. They’re like freedom in your mouth, independence dancing on your taste buds, just like Football on Thanksgiving. Eating a Toaster Strudel is like regaining your childhood and going down your first slide all over again, playing hide and seek in the washer/dryer and playing in the middle of the street without worrying about getting hit or kidnapped as long as you were inside when the street lights came on.

 

With that being said, Toaster Strudel is worth the price you pay at the register, and it’s certainly worth the bloating and burning at home. Why are they not flying off the shelves more, especially with the legalization of marijuana in some places? Communists, that’s why. Damn communists.

Fandom Friday- Trampolines

Welcome to Fandom Friday, where I talk about something or someone that I like and why you should too. This week I will simply be writing about trampolines.

 

You may be asking yourself, why the hell am I going to sit here and read a blog on a bouncy mat that is targeted on children? That’s exactly why you’re going to read this blog. It’s targeted toward children. That little desire inside of you to keep jumping higher and higher and push the boundaries of “how many flips can I do in one jump” is burning the depths of your soul right now.

 

To quote the movie Role Models, “You can’t BS a BS’er”. Everybody that ever set foot on a trampoline ever in the history of ever asked themselves the same questions and said the same things. “I want to see how high I can jump”, “I want to learn how to do a front flip”, “how is this an Olympic sport?”, and eventually it elevated to “check this out. I’m going to do a two thirds back flip with a misty turn then follow it up a seven twenty head-spinning, back-kicking, fist-pumping hoorah to the heavens where I will then grab this tree branch and land on one finger and hoist myself into another flip but slightly turn to the left where I will land on my stomach (but it won’t hurt because, duh, I’m on a tramp and I’m awesome like that) and it will shoot me into what I like to the Star Spangled Bad-Assery. 

 

Everyone had those moments. And in those moments, I would have to guess that a large portion of the time, we were showing our parents and they were FREAKING THE FUCK OUT!! Afterwards, they said it was “coooool”…

 

Bull Ma. Bull. When I was in mid air, I hit slow-mo mode and I caught a glimpse of your face. You looked so scared, you almost looked constipated so bad that you were crying and cringing onto dad’s arm who you could tell was thinking, “Oh great, another trip to the ER”. He thought it looked cool though and he meant it when he said it. You just looked like you took a rhino horn to the sphincter in the tookus.

 

But hell, that was childhood! That was fun! What the hell happened? Every time we walk by a trampoline, a little bit of us dies. For those of us that remembers how much fun we used to have and just look at it, without at least getting on to jump higher and higher (even without the daredevil stunts), our child weeps as it dies inside of us.

 

Shit, when was the last time you even jumped on your bed? Forget your spouse!! Let them look at you like you’re a nut case!! JUMP ON BOARD MY MOVEMENT!! LET YOUR CHILD PLAY!!!!! For fuck’s sake, they didn’t do anything to deserve the miserable death they are dying inside of you and your terrible adult shaped body!  Let them play! Let them have some life! Who cares what other people think! What is the worst thing that will happen to you?! Oh, you got a dumb look? Boo fucking hoo, so sorry you had your feelings hurt. AT LEAST NOW YOU CAN SAY YOU HAD SOME DAMN FUN TODAY!! You actually LIVED today. Even for just a moment, for just a second, you seized that moment and you will smile and laugh the rest of the day because you made your inner child happy. That child doesn’t go away. Keep jumping, keep having fun, keep living for you, living in the moment.

 

Go through the window.

Growing Up vs Growing Old

As another birthday comes closer and closer, I begin to think, “Shit, I’m going to die soon.” Yes, to most I may still be a youngling, but hey, I don’t have “good genes” or “ideal health”. I look around and see the elderly taking the leap into the unknown, and yet, I am not afraid. I do not personally think there is a reason to fear death. Even if my personal death comes painful, it all has to come to end sometime. In the book “Tough Sh*t” by my long time hero, Kevin Smith, he wrote, “…even good men die screaming…” and I must say, that one sentence changed my life forever.

Now I’m not saying to live a life where you raise total hell and take no prisoners in a bad perspective. What I am saying is don’t just live life but LIVE life, aka, the difference between growing UP and growing OLD.

I don’t mind my metabolism going to hell and getting a belly that goes over my belt, or my hair falling out, or my skin wrinkling around the wrist, or not being able to wear boxers with shorts in fear of indecent exposure because my genitals hang too low (like the scene from jackass). It’s perfectly fine taking pills 19 times a day and having to sit down in a shower because “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up!”

But I’ll be damned the day I walk by a vacant swing set and don’t sit my fat, bald, wrinkly ass down and enjoy the view come and go as I go up and down on one of the sweetest childhood memories EVERYONE has. I’ll be damned the day a little girl walks up to me and I’m “too old” to “answer a ringing toy phone” she hands me. I’ll be damned the day I grab the Cheerios for “heart health” instead of grabbing the box of Fruity Pebbles cause they just taste good. I’ll be damned the day I skip through the cartoon section of the TV guide. And you bet your sweet ass that I’ll be damned the day that I say, “No thanks, I’ve had enough Cheetos”.

Life is not all about the big picture. In the long run, yes because it is about the career and family and what have you, but when is the last time you thought about today? Just enjoyed the little things? Keep the little kid inside of you and never let it go. You have to grow up to a certain extent of course, you have to get a job and so on to survive this world, but who said you can’t still stick some chips in your PBJ at lunch? If someone says anything, just feel bad for them, because they are already dead inside fighting to stay alive.